How Not to Get an Afghan Visa

I returned to Islamabad late Wednesday night, and my first order of business was to get an Afghan visa in the hopes I'd be able to fly to Kabul on Monday. Here's how the process went:

1) 10:30 am. Arrive at consulate to get visa application. Breathe sigh of relief: sign says it only takes one day to get a visa. Unfortunately, sign also says I must bring photocopies of the visa application and of my passport, so I'll have to return. Deadline: Noon.

2) Return to consulate, realize I forgot photocopy of passport. Time: 11:50. Race to the nearest market and find a photocopy shop. Cost: 1 rupee. Discover the smallest bill I've got is a 500. The shopkeeper gives me the photocopy for free. Race back to the consulate and turn in documents. Time: 11:59. Hoorah! Afghan official tells me to come back Monday at 9:30 to pay for the visa and then Monday at 4 pm to pick up the passport. One day visa? Sorry, the consulate takes three day weekends. Friday is the Afghan Saturday, and Pakistan takes Saturday and Sunday as a weekend...

Plane leaves Monday at 1 pm. Next flight out: Thursday. ARGH!!!

3) Monday morning. Return to consulate at 9:30 sharp. Cool my heels outside with a gang of Afghan men. Am finally allowed inside. At front of line I wait behind the glass while Afghan bureaucrats take their time drinking tea and sorting out their morning's business, which doesn't appear to have much to do with handing out visas. Pay. At last. Leave. Feel the stress that is Afghanistan reaching across borders to give me aneurism.

4) 4 pm. Return to collect passport. Discover I've only been given a 15-day visa. Curse at length.