Bad Omens from the Romance Gods

I thought I'd diversify my collection of antique Halloween postcards and move into vintage Valentines. The Halloween postcards have been a delight for three reasons: 1) They're cheap and cheerful; 2) They're easy to store; and 3) I like reading other people's mail.

So I surfed on over to eBay and bought a few. The caveat with eBay, however, is that one's working off of pictures of the item, and they're not necessarily as detailed as one would want. But at only $2-3 a pop, I wasn't too fussed. Still, imagine my surprise when the first Valentine's postcard arrived in the mail:

"To my Valentine,
Tis a lemon that I hand you
and bid you now 'skidoo'
Because I love another-
There is no chance for you!"

It was sent from Hicksville, Ohio, to a poor sap named Clarence. No message on the back.

My sister thought it was hysterical, so I handed it off to her and figured it wasn't a total loss.

Then the second vintage card arrived. This one was quite charming - a lovely drawing of a woman in Victorian dress and a cupid. I puzzled over the spidery handwriting on the back, hoping for something, if not salacious, than mildly romantic (it was postmarked 1910). It read:

"Hey old pal. I don't know if you've heard yet, but I've got bad news. Our friend, Mr. Lindey was killed when the bridge collapsed..."